Your story is pretty common. No matter what you do "following the rules" it is nearly impossible to get ahead.

I quit my first job and moved abroad largely for the difference in salary. I had no plan after college to start my own company, but I could see staying at the very successful company where I had gotten hired and was succeeding was never going to lead to a big salary, at least not any time soon.

I know a lot of people my situation would jump firms every 3 years or so as a way to make more money. That route didn't appeal to me for various reasons.

My plan was to work self-employed for a few years until the work dried up, but in the meantime I could save the extra pay from being self-employed for that rainy day. Fortunately for me I was too naive to know how risky what I was doing was.

It worked out for me and I still have my same company 30 years later, but I'm kind of an exception that proves the rule. Most people my age back in the US are in your situation. It totally sucks.