Compassionate is a very subjective term.

I have a close family member (actually several) who are functioning alcoholics. Telling someone close to you that they are an alcoholic is also not seen as "compassionate" by people who want to look away from the problem and/or ignore the problem in themselves. The first step in solving a problem is admitting there IS a problem.

"Obese you" like "alcoholic you" is blunt, but honest. Sorry, not sorry you don't like it.